Starting out as a new SMOM, I was in waaay over my head. I’m still learning every day, and I struggle with some of the same issues that I struggled with 3 years ago. Right now, if I could go back, I would do 3 things differently:
1) Remember that it’s not my duty to love his kids. That’s his job. My duty is to respect and care for them, but I’m not required to instantly love them. I think if I had given myself some slack in this area, I would have saved us all a lot of drama.
2) Talked about rules and consequences BEFORE we got married. Trying to create structure day to day without a conversation ahead was more than difficult. What I had in mind for parenting was totally different from my husband’s ideas.
3) This goes with number 2: remember that it’s not my job to discipline the kids, or “keep track” of their consequences for rules broken. Stepping back and allowing my husband to do the parenting of HIS kids, and not try to jump in and take all that stress on myself. It just leads to a lot of frustration…