1) I wish that I had never doubted myself or DH for a second. My judgement and instincts have been right the entire time.
2) I am a teacher and have loved children from a young age. Building a relationship with SS11 has been very hard for me, because I was used to children warming right up to me and loving me from the start. Until I met SS, I had never met a child that didn’t like me. I finally realized that, there is nothing I can do about this. BM does everything in her power to sabotage my relationship with SS because she is jealous and childlike. My relationship with SS should not be a threat to her, but it is. Anyway, I wish that I had not let myself get so eaten up with guilt (and trying to be better).
I wish I had just stayed true to myself all along. This would have been so much more fun for SS and for us. I am back to being me and not caring about what she does/says. I am letting all that go. I just wish I had never grabbed on so, that I didn’t have to let go. I would like to have the time back that I have wasted trying to fix SS’s life, make things better for him, cried, been stressed out and been upset because of BM. I can’t get that time back, but I can never ever let her have another second of my life unwillingly!
3)I wish that I never tried to reach out to BM. I should have remained more neutral and less involved. I was sincerely trying to help SS, but I should have let DH do it. When I reached out, I was still hoping that we could all get along enough to help SS. BM was very rude to me and it really only made things worse for a while. Lesson learned.